Goncharov: why has the internet invented a fake Martin Scorsese film?
Sian, Im seeing a lot of talk about a Martin Scorsese film called Goncharov. But Ive never heard of a Martin Scorsese film called Goncharov. Whats going on?
Ah yes, theres been a lot of talk on Tumblr about the greatest mafia movie ever made.
Released in 1973, the little-seen Scorsese flick starred Robert De Niro as Goncharov, a former discotheque owner who comes to Naples after the fall of the Soviet Union with the goal of becoming a mob boss. Harvey Keitel plays the eye-patched Andrey (or Andrei) The Banker Daddano; Gene Hackman plays Valery Michailov; Al Pacino appears as Mario Ambrosini and Cybill Shepherd plays Goncharovs wife, Katya. Apparently, it was really good and was added to the Criterion Collection.
And youve never heard of it because it doesnt actually exist.
What.
So a few years ago, a Tumblr user posted a photo of some knockoff boots they had ordered online that had a very strange tag on the tongue: The greatest mafia movie ever made. Martin Scorsese presents GONCHAROV. Domenico Proccacci production. A film by Matteo JWHJ0715. About the Naples Mafia.
This mostly went ignored until 2020, when another Tumblr user reblogged a comment made on the original post, reading: this idiot hasnt seen goncharov. Like the good lord himself and the Guardians coffee machine, the internet works in mysterious ways; earlier this month, Tumblr user beelzeebub made a fake poster for the film, tens of thousands of people were suddenly sharing it and lo: a new Scorsese film was born.
« , »alt »: »A fake movie poster for a made-up film, Goncharov by Martin Scorsese. The poster reads: Martin Scorsese presents Goncharov. A film by Matteo JWHJ 0715. A tagline underneath says: Winter comes to Naples, while underneath a composite showing Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Gene Hackman, Harvey Keitel, John Cazale and Cybill Shepherd in various roles, text says ‘The greatest mafia movie ever made’ and A Domenico Proccacci production », »index »:7, »isTracking »:true, »isMainMedia »:false, »sourceDomain »: »assets.tumblr.com » »>
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« , »alt »: »A post by Tumblr user hanniecat922 which shows another post by Tumblr user nemesis-is-my-middle-name that reads: bitches will be like \ »my ot3 [heart emojis]\ » and it’s a woman who could murder them, a guy who hasn’t had good night’s sleep in six years, and another guy who almost got both of the other two murdered. it’s me i’m bitches. Underneath the post are three pictures of Cybill Shepherd, Robert De Niro and Al Pacino respectively, with text overlaid on each. The first reads \ »woman who could murder them\ »; the second reads \ »a guy who hasn’t had good night’s sleep in six years\ »; the third reads \ »another guy who almost got both of the other two murdered\ » », »index »:8, »isTracking »:true, »isMainMedia »:false, »sourceDomain »: »assets.tumblr.com » »>
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So Tumblr just made it up?
Yep! And like all of the best jokes, people have really committed to the bit. Theres the films poster, which has the tagline greatest mafia movie (n)ever made. A music teacher in Indiana composed a theme song for Goncharov, inspired by The Godfather. There is also a cash-in video game, with an accompanying soundtrack, and a fake VHS. Academics wrote essays analysing the film, which were published in (fake) film journals. A representative for the movie reviewing platform Letterboxd even told the New York Times that they had had to remove multiple reviews for the film that had been submitted by users.